A View of the C

Funny – Inappropriate – Edumacational

A Throne With Some Personality

Tired of looking at the same old ceramic orifice?  After looking at these, you may reconsider and rekindle your feelings of appreciation for ol’ faithful.

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November 14, 2008 Posted by | Did you know?, Funny | , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Zen of Sarcasm

zen1The Zen of Sarcasm 

  1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.
  2. It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
  3. Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
  4. Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
  5. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
  6. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
  7. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes
  8. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.
  9. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
  10. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment.
  11. If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
  12. Some days you’re the bug; some days you’re the windshield.
  13. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
  14. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
  15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
  16. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
  17. Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your lips are moving.
  18. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
  19. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
  20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

November 14, 2008 Posted by | Commentary, Funny | , , , | Leave a comment

Hottie Poll: Jake Gyllenhaal

Jake Gyllenhaal has gone from geeky adorable to studly buffster over the years, which do you prefer? I want to know.

jake-dd  jake-bb   jake-2  jake-3  jake-4  jake-5  jake-santa  jake-6  jake-1  

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November 14, 2008 Posted by | Did you know?, Hotness | , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Bill O’Reilly Gets Spun on The Daily Show

Jon Stewart tells Bill O’Reilly that gay marriage is the next step in America’s tradition. Watch these two go at it a bit, although you won’t probably change your opinion of either. Go Jon!

Vodpod videos no longer available.

November 14, 2008 Posted by | Commentary, Did you know?, Funny, Politics | , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Lisa Wu Hartwell Is Not A “Crack Whore”

lisa-wu-hartwell1“The Real Housewives of Atlanta” star Lisa Wu Hartwell responds to allegations made by her costar Kim Zolciak, who claims Hartwell threatened her. Check out excerpts of her interview with Essence:

ESSENCE.COM: Your costar Kim Zolciak has accused you of threatening to kill her. Is that true?
LISA WU HARTWELL: Never would I threaten to kill anyone. Kim made a very heinous statement about me. She said I was a crack whore [Zolciak denies making this statement.] and that’s the reason I don’t have my kids [Justin and Jason]. Not only did she lie and insult me, but she insulted my children and my integrity. I have never done drugs in my life. I am a businesswoman. What kind of business you in?

ESSENCE.COM: Wow. Who did Kim tell that you were a “crack whore”?

HARTWELL: She was on the set of Demi Moore’s new film “The Joneses,” which costars David Duchovny and Chris Williams [the brother of “Ugly Betty” star Vanessa Williams], and the “Real Housewives of Atlanta” cast was invited to star in as extras. I declined, but she and Sheree went. She didn’t realize the people she said this to about me were friends of mine. I’m a businesswoman-an actress, writer and producer of movies-and to have her making up lies about me to people I could potentially work with one day is crazy! She said those things in front of Demi Moore.

(They let Kim’s weave that close to Demi, awww hell no! Demi is a goddess!)  striptease

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November 14, 2008 Posted by | Funny | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

How Some Cope With the Economy

 Click to enlarge, get it, enlarge! hahaha

November 14, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | , , , , , | Leave a comment

Ross Matthews Is Desperately Seeking Madonna

Sent by Jay Leno, Ross Matthews sets out to talk to Madonna before her show starts…hilarity ensues.

Watch here!

November 14, 2008 Posted by | Did you know?, Funny | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Ecstasy Used To Treat PTSD

A recent study is crediting MDMA with the ability for people suffering from PTSD to overcome their internal strongholds.  I really like how the pod below doesn’t focus solely upon PTSD that is connected with service in the military because this is a condition that affects others too. 

Vodpod videos no longer available.

** I would be so pissed if they gave me a placebo for participating in this study that I’d likely cause PTSD to someone else!! LOL! **

Dare I think that one day both weed and ecstasy would actually be medically prescribed in the United States….  I don’t know, maybe that will be something I can tell my kids to look for after I’m gone.

November 14, 2008 Posted by | Commentary, Did you know?, Economy, Fitness, Inspiration, Politics, technology | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

88-Keys – The Death Of Adam

Released in October, this new album is pretty good.  It’s kind of like N.E.R.D. without all the yelling.  Their track ‘stay up!’ is the most re-known but the rest of the album is, in my opinion, even better.

iTunes has some samples, but you can Click Here to hear all the tunes!

doa

November 14, 2008 Posted by | Did you know?, Music | , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

USA Customer Service Problems

Dear World:

The United States of America, your quality supplier of ideals of
liberty and democracy, would like to apologize for its 2001-2008
service outage.

The technical fault that led to this eight-year service
interruption has been located, and the parts responsible for it
were replaced Tuesday night, November 4. Early tests of the newly-
installed equipment indicate that it is functioning correctly, and
we expect it to be fully functional by mid-January.

We apologize for any inconvenience caused by the outage, and we
look forward to resuming full service — and hopefully even to
improving it in years to come.

Thank you for your patience and understanding,

The USA

November 14, 2008 Posted by | Commentary, Funny, Politics | , , , , | Leave a comment

Nebraska Law Backfires

Total sadness, WTF is wrong with people? There’s the letter of the law and the intent of the law, and I doubt this was the intent of the law – so fix it! Poor kids, this whole concept is truly just so sad. I’m not trying to judge here, but how the hell can you fly from Miami and then leave your kid?

Nebraska officials said they’re concerned about an apparent rush by parents to drop their teenage children off at hospitals before lawmakers change the state’s troubled “safe haven” law.

Four children have been dropped off at Nebraska hospitals in the last two days.

The latest cases came on the eve of a special session of the Legislature on Friday to add an age limit to the law. On Thursday, a boy, 14, and his 17-year-old sister were dropped off at an Omaha hospital; the girl ran away from the hospital, officials said. A 5-year-old boy was left by his mother at a different hospital, officials said.

The day before, a father flew in from Miami, Florida, to leave his teenage son at a hospital, officials said.

“Please don’t bring your teenager to Nebraska,” Gov. Dave Heineman told CNN. “Think of what you are saying. You are saying you no longer support them. You no longer love them.”

  • Twenty-seven children have received mental health treatment;
  • 28 children come from single parent homes;
  • 22 children had a parent with a history of incarceration; and
  • 20 of the 30 children are white; eight are black.
  • There are 6,600 children in state custody, according to the Department of Health and Human Services. Per capita the figure is one of the highest rates in the country, Landry said.

    Read the rest of the article here.

    November 14, 2008 Posted by | Commentary, Did you know? | , , , , , | Leave a comment

    50 Cent Hits a Delay

    50-centOriginally due Dec. 16, 50 Cent’s new album, “Before I Self Destruct,” has been pushed to an unspecified date in early 2009.

    Interscope says the artist was “rushing” to meet the December date but “with the deadline to secure advertising and retail placement for the album imminent,” the rapper opted to wait until next year.

    The album boasts production and guest turns from mentors Dr. Dre and Eminem; producer Scott Storch helmed first single “Get Up.” (source)

    November 14, 2008 Posted by | Did you know?, Music | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

    Kanye West – Arrested In England – A Different Kind Of Lockdown

    Allegedly, our boi Yeezy has been arrested for assault in England after another paparazzi fiasco. 

    kanye

    Best Week Ever -OR- Worst Week Ever ???
    Are these feelings of sympathy I have even warranted?  I mean, part of me thinks he’s had a rough 12 months with his mother’s passing, but then he doesn’t really seem to be shaken by that anymore.  He’s being featured in an upcoming Fader, is continually at the top of the billboards, recently launched a weezy search engine, yet he continually seems to be attracting more bitch assness from the media, leaked songs, etc.

    “It’s lonely at the top” – Mr. West, 2008

    November 14, 2008 Posted by | Did you know?, Music, Music Video, Pop-Trash Pickup, Rant | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

    E is for Excellent!

    Cheesy title, but that’s the letter of the option I prefer. If you live in Seattle, you probably know that the whole Alaska Viaduct issue has been ongoing and basically, everyone who rides on it probably has visions of the whole San Francisco earthquake where the double-decker road came crashing down…well, that’s very similar to this one and would probably have a similar result. Scary!

    Gov. Chris Gregoire (whom I admire) has vowed to tear down the structure by 2012, but there has been a long-standing argument over how to replace it and some argue it should simply be reinforced. Again, if you know the Seattle area you would know that while we can’t seem to commit to change, we also can’t seem to commit to alternative solutions when we shoot down that proposed change. So finally, Gregoire has drawn a line in the sand and hopefully that will expedite options. Continue reading

    November 14, 2008 Posted by | Did you know?, Politics | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

    I Caught That Excuse That’s Going Around

    From The Onion:

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    ANN ARBOR, MI—Digital Copy Shoppe employee Don Newson, 38, called in to work on Wednesday complaining that he was certain he had come down with the 24-hour excuse that has been going around. “My back is killing me, I feel stuffed up, and I have this pounding headache,” said Newson, citing the initial symptoms of the excuse, which often afflicts those who are already late for work. “It sucks, because I want to come in, but I don’t want anyone else to catch what I’ve got. I should be fine after sleeping for a couple days.” Newson has placed himself on a strict regimen of watching the past six episodes of Entourage on HBO on Demand to cure the excuse.

    November 14, 2008 Posted by | Funny | , , , , | Leave a comment